Sunday, February 26, 2006
Banging your head against a wall can burn up to 150 calories per hour
- Sam Keen
There was always the consolation that if I didn't like what I wrote I could throw it away or burn it.
- Carl Sandburg
Sir Bedevere: There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
Peasant 1: Are there? Oh well, tell us.
Sir Bedevere: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
Peasant 1: Burn them.
Sir Bedevere: And what do you burn, apart from witches?
Peasant 1: More witches.
Peasant 2: Wood.
Sir Bedevere: Good. Now, why do witches burn?
Peasant 3: ...because they're made of... wood?
Sir Bedevere: Good. So how do you tell whether she is made of wood?
Peasant 1: Build a bridge out of her.
Sir Bedevere: But can you not also build bridges out of stone?
Peasant 1: Oh yeah.
Sir Bedevere: Does wood sink in water?
Peasant 1: No, no, it floats!... It floats! Throw her into the pond!
Sir Bedevere: No, no. What else floats in water?
Peasant 1: Bread.
Peasant 2: Apples.
Peasant 3: Very small rocks.
Peasant 1: Cider.
Peasant 2: Gravy.
Peasant 3: Cherries.
Peasant 1: Mud.
Peasant 2: Churches.
Peasant 3: Lead! Lead!
King Arthur: A Duck.
Sir Bedevere: ...Exactly. So, logically...
Peasant 1: If she weighed the same as a duck... she's made of wood.
Sir Bedevere: And therefore...
Peasant 2: ...A witch!
- Monty Python
"Have you got any soul?" a woman asks the next afternoon. That depends, I feel like saying; some days yes, some days no. A few days ago I was right out; now I've got loads, too much, more than I can handle. I wish I could spread it a bit more evenly, I want to tell her, get a better balance, but I can't seem to get it sorted. I can see she wouldn't be interested in my internal stock control problems though, so I simply point to where I keep the soul I have, right by the exit, just next to the blues.
- Nick Hornby, "High Fidelity"
One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain.
- Bob Marley
“You’re through. Finished. Burned out. Used up. You’ve been replaced. . . forgotten. That’s a lie!”
- Charles R. Swindoll
Saint Anger 'round my neck
He never gets respect
Saint Anger 'round my neck
I'm madly in anger with you
And I want my anger to be healthy
And I want my anger just for me
And I need my anger not to control
And I want my anger to be me
And I need to set my anger free
Set it free
- Metallica "St. Anger"
This is the wiki web for 43 Folders, which we've conceived as a place to explore and expand on the ideas discussed on the 43F site. Popular topics on 43 Folders include:
* productivity and time management practices
* Macintosh OS X software
* Life hacks and other smart heuristics
* Cool tools and Productivity pr0n
And any cool ideas that help people to accomplish their goals, route around bad behaviors or replace them with good ones, reduce stress, find - or make - the time to do things they enjoy
Saturday, February 25, 2006
RIP MIX BURN: sigur rós - takk...
sigur rós - takk...: "‘takk…’, the fourth album from sigur rós, was released by emi records on september 12. written, performed and produced by the band (along with co-producer ken thomas) at their studio in álafoss, iceland, ‘takk…’ is the record to justify every amazing claim ever laid at this exceptional band’s door.
huge and intimate, orchestral and gossamer-light, rich layered and essentially simple, ‘takk…’ is a work of a band operating at the very top of their game. it accomplishes what maybe they haven’t done since they first appeared, which is to make high-flown ideas appear to be straight ahead pop music, or, perhaps more accurately, invest pop music with a sense of magic long since lost in the mists of time and imagination (not that they sound anything like any music made back in any mythical musical heyday).
‘takk…’ seems to operate so far outside the confines of what else is going on as to make comparison redundant. that the band were not going to be held by any narrow categorisation was apparent from the off. that they might be capable of creativity at this level of freedom and imagination was more than any of us might ever have hoped for. ‘takk…’ is an instant classic, and might well turn out to be sigur rós’s masterpiece."
Friday, February 24, 2006
Saturday, February 18, 2006
KILT WATCH: Denied!
The International Skating Union got rid of 'skirts only' rule - that is to say for women.
Scottish ice dancer John Kerr was thwarted in his bid to wear a kilt the represent the theme he and sister Sinead Kerr want to use for their free skate.
'There was some thought that would be a good idea. But the first page of the ISU rules states that a man must wear trousers,' he explained.
My Beard, Reviewed
R E V I E W E D .
BY CHRIS BACHELDER
- - - -
Average Customer Rating: *** (Based on 9 reviews)
**** Must-see beard!!!
Reviewer: A. Dawson from San Antonio, TX, USA
This is the best beard I've seen all year. It's one of those beards where you just never want it to end. If you get a chance, CHECK OUT THIS BEARD. You won't be sorry. I guarantee it.
* pathetic
Reviewer: Jennifer K. from Rochester, NY, USA
I just can't believe what passes for a good beard these days. I teach junior high English, and I've seen better beards on my eighth-graders. Don't waste your time. I'll take Hemingway's beard every time over today's beards.
TIMOTHY MCSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY IS AN
OFFSHOOT OF TIMOTHY MCSWEENEY'S QUARTERLY
CONCERN, A JOURNAL CREATED BY NERVOUS PEOPLE IN
RELATIVE OBSCURITY, AND PUBLISHED FOUR TIMES A
YEAR.
- - - -
Copyright
All things published in (on?) Timothy McSweeney's Internet Tendency are copyrighted, in the worldwide sense, and cannot be reprinted -- or even spoken about -- without the written approval of a McSweeney's representative. They will be standing at the exits, wearing red vests.
Frequency
We will put some things "up," so to speak, on some days, and on other days, we will not put things up. Whether or not we put things up will depend largely on whether, on a particular day, we have anything to put up. For example, let's say that on Monday we have something which we want to put up. On that day, we will put that thing up. On Tuesday, though, we might not have anything to put up. We will worry for a moment about not having anything to put up. "Oh no," we might say, "another day has come, and we have nothing to put up. What will happen if someone visits this site and there is nothing new to look at? Will people be angry?" But then we will realize that, chances are, people will not be angry -- that, chances are, people will understand. Most people are pretty understanding.
Length
Considering this is the web and all, we will try to keep things readably short. (Unless something needs to be longer, in which case that piece will be longer.)
Design
Nothing will be designed.
Links
There will be no links.
Hyperlinks
Are those different from regular links?
I am not sure.
Well, we'll have none of those, either.
Okay.
Archives
We will have those. Those will be easily accessible at the bottom of the site's page.
Proofreading
Will be done by an unqualified person.
Friday, February 17, 2006
The CulturePulp Q&A: Joss Whedon
[Regarding Serenity/Firefly]
"Q. The show and film are also fascinating in that they have no aliens, or dorks in jumpsuits with prosthetics on their nose-ridges. Nor does the spaceship in any way resemble a flying Sheraton Hotel."
Thursday, February 16, 2006
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Tuesday Morning Quarterback
Would the Green Room for Sleep Actors Have Bunks and Pillows?: Ads for the new sleep aid Lunesta show a woman slumbering blissfully as a glowing luna moth hovers above her. Is a luna moth really the best image? The luna moth is nocturnal but incapable of sleeping, or eating for that matter; as the adult stage of a caterpillar, the luna moth mates for about a week, then dies. Probably the Lunesta documentation does not caution, "Side effects may include inability to eat plus frenzied mating followed by rapid death."
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
Monday, February 13, 2006
Fübar Watch: Married, Arrested
02/13/2006 11:23 AM, E! Online
For Scott Stapp, the honeymoon was over before it even began.
Hours after the former Creed frontman tied the knot with beauty queen Jaclyn Nesheiwat in Miami on Friday, the rocker was rung up for public intoxication in Los Angeles.
Stapp, en route to his Hawaiian honeymoon, was stopped from boarding a plane at Los Angeles International Airport Saturday after airline personnel deemed the rocker "antagonistic" and "boisterous."
A spokesman for the airport police, Lieutenant Tyrone Stallings, said the rocker was arrested on suspicion of being drunk in a public place and taken to the Van Nuys station for processing.
According to TMZ.com, which first reported the incident, Stapp demanded a blood-alcohol test at the station, where he registered a 0.18--twice the legal limit.
[maybe he got Leif Garrett's autograph while in the slammer]
RIP MIX BURN
- Various SYSTEM OF A DOWN records played at 11 - "Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?"
- Boot Liquor Radio: "Americana Country Music Radio for Drinking Cowboys. Radio for Cowhands, Cowpokes, and Cowtippers. What the heck is this format? Boot Liquor is a disturbing mix of Country, Singer/Songwriter, Rock, Folk and Bluegrass. It's Alt-Country/Americana at its core, but somewhat musically flexible (if the lyrics are a good match). Songs I play tend to have an interesting (storytelling) or humorous narrative, such as those typically found on the Bloodshot or YepRoc Labels. Boozing, drugging, soured relationships and hard living songs get played more than anything else. Generic, bland or sentimental country is avoided at all costs."
- Ray LaMontagne - "Trouble" - first time I heard him, I was flipping channels past Austin City Limits on PBS, didn't flip for another 30 minutes.
- Various classic HEAVY METAL stations on SHOUTcast internet radio, via Winamp. [insert DEVIL HORN hand gesture here]
Sunday, February 12, 2006
Saturday, February 11, 2006
GIANT SHARK WATCH: Middle Earth
Dave Chadfield, who operates Chaddy's Charters, is taking groups on "shark sighting tours" around the Sugar Loaf Islands.
"We're trying to get a shark, so if you put your feet in the water, that would be helpful," he told passengers yesterday.
Numerous sightings of a 6m great white shark, known as the Taranaki Terror, have closed Taranaki beaches and created national headlines in the past few weeks.
To make matters worse, the Department of Conservation said yesterday there might actually be two great whites lurking.
Mr Chadfield, who operates his restored English lifeboat as a tourist boat, is making the most of the shark fever.
He has placed three plywood dorsal fins in the water around the Sugar Loaf Islands.
"I had people saying to me 'if I don't see a shark, do I get my money back?', so I thought I'd create one. They look real and people love it."
The most likely place to see a great white would be near the islands, he said.
"It's like a McDonald's out at the islands, with all the seals."
STREAKER WATCH
A naked man ran on to the high-security grounds of the United Nations today while a gate was being opened to allow a car to enter, police said.
The man was running north on First Avenue when he slipped through the open gate near 42nd Street, police said.
He was stopped by UN security guards and held until police arrived.
He was taken to hospital for psychiatric evaluation, police said.
The man identified himself to police and said he was 32 years old.
KILT WATCH: Scott's Porage Oats
The Daily Record - NEWS - EXCLUSIVE: WE'RE SOLD OAT
Exclusive Comeback for porridge as trendy diet takes off
By Lachlan Mackinnon
A TRENDY diet has prompted a spurt-le in porridge sales.
Once regarded as a granny's favourite, the traditional Scottish breakfast dish is enjoying a storming comeback as a staple of the glycaemic index (GI) diet.
One of Scotland's most famous brand images, the man in a kilt on Scott's Porage Oats, is vanishing as stores sell out of the stuff.
Sales of Scott's Porage Oats have soared by 21 per cent in the past year. Cereal giants Jordan say their porridge sales have risen by 75 per cent in that time.
Tourism chiefs market Scots hunks - Yahoo! News UK
FORGET the glorious glens, the majestic mountains and Loch Ness. The best way to attract tourists to Scotland is with our handsome men, according to the country's official tourism agency.
VisitScotland is so confident of the allure of the Caledonian male, preferably in a kilt, it has compiled an online list of the country's 20 most eligible bachelors in an attempt to lure visitors to the country.
Scotland is already famed as a top place to marry but now it seems it is the place to find a potential groom. Fuelled by "kilt- ripper" novels in the US and dramas such as Monarch of the Glen, it seems demand for Scottish men has never been higher.
Now www.dateahotscot.com promises to give women around the world a glimpse of what is on offer.
[snip]
But other Scotswomen were not as convinced at how easy it is to find a handsome man roaming the glens.
Janey Godley, the Glasgow comedian, was less sure about the allure of the Scottish male, particularly her own generation, whom she described as "hobbits with hairy feet and bad teeth".
Royal Tenenbaums Watch: Dance Contest
[does a frantic jig across the living room]
Big Sister: "Yeah! I win a trophy!"
Big Sister: [to Little Sister] "You win some soap."
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
KILT WATCH
Also on hand: Broadway's Alan Cumming, wearing an orange plaid kilt to match his Scottish brogue; James Cromwell, the Six Feet Under actor who once costarred with a pig in Babe; Tim Gunn, chair of the department of fashion design at Parsons School of Design and a regular on Bravo's Project Runway; and Nanci Alexander, co-owner of Fort Lauderdale's Sublime restaurant and president of the Animal Rights Foundation of Florida (ARFF). Sipping a smoked pear martini, Alexander said she flew to New York just for the PETA party.
[editor's note: uh... smoked pear martini? this is just cruel to humans and pears]
'AMERICANS DON'T UNDERSTAND SCOTTISH STYLE'
Actor ALAN CUMMING was stunned to be criticised by a US magazine for wearing a skirt, when in fact he was wearing his national dress - a kilt.
The Scottish X2 star can't understand why Americans are so shocked when they see him walking the streets in the tartan garment .
He says, "On the internet recently I was on People magazine's worst-dressed list for the Ugliest Skirt Of The Year. They didn't even call it a kilt.
"I wore a kilt recently, a denim one. You'd have thought I was wearing a pair of panties or I was in a bikini, the shock and awe it caused."
Lost World
JAKARTA, Indonesia – Soon after scientists landed by helicopter in the mist-shrouded mountains of one of Indonesia’s most remote provinces, they stumbled upon a primitive egg-laying mammal that allowed itself to be picked up and brought to their field camp.
Describing a “lost world” apparently never visited by humans, members of the team said Tuesday that they also saw large mammals that have been hunted to near-extinction elsewhere and discovered dozens of exotic new species of frogs, butterflies and palms.
“It’s a spectacularly beautiful Garden of Eden,” said Bruce Beehler, a co-leader of the monthlong trip to the Foja Mountains, an area in the eastern province of Papua with roughly 2 million acres of pristine tropical forest.
“We’ve only scratched the surface. There was not a single trail, no sign of civilization, no sign of even local communities ever having been there."
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
Tuesday Morning Quarterback
More Proof of the Decline of Western Civilization: The first State of the Union address, delivered by George Washington in 1790, was 1,087 words long and contained this magnificent passage: "Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness. In one, in which the measures of government receive their impression so immediately from the sense of the community, as in ours, it is proportionately essential. To the security of a free Constitution it contributes in various ways: By convincing those who are entrusted with the public administration, that every valuable end of government is best answered by the enlightened confidence of the people: And by teaching the people themselves to know, and to value their own rights; to discern and provide against invasions of them; to distinguish between oppression and the necessary exercise of lawful authority; between burdens proceeding from a disregard to their convenience, and those resulting from the inevitable exigencies of society; to discriminate the spirit of liberty from that of licentiousness, cherishing the first, avoiding the last, and uniting a speedy but temperate vigilance against encroachments, with an inviolable respect to the laws." Last week's State of the Union address was 5,432 words long and contained such passages as, "We'll fund additional research in cutting-edge methods of producing ethanol, not just from corn but from wood chips" and "Tonight, let me speak directly to the citizens of Iran."
[snip]
Super Bowl Ad Watch: The Stunt City ad was the only memorably clever commercial; it was so funny viewers might have missed the product being promoted. That was Degree antiperspirant; click the extra-silly "director's cut." Blockbuster ran ads for a service that promises "free movies every month" for $9.99 a month. Let's review what the word "free" means, please.
[snip]
Patriots Announce Stadium to be Renamed: Next One Will Have 11 Trans-Dimensional Nanoprobe-Embedded Force-Field-Projecting Blades Field: Reader Josh Byrne of Philadelphia relates the news that Gillette's six-blade razor has already been trumped -- Hitachi just released a 10-bladed razor, which "plays at invariable speed, ensuring the overall effectiveness." As noted last week, TMQ's Law of Razors holds that each century will see a razor with blades equal to the factorial of the highest number of blades on a razor of the previous century. This means that in the 22nd century, someone will market razor with 3,628,800 blades (10x9x8x7x6x5x4x3x2x1).
egads!
QUINTIPPIO - The New 15 Blade Mega Shave! - this is a viral advertising campaign for something from Norelco - still funny nonetheless
Monday, February 06, 2006
KILT-LOVING NUCLEAR PHYSICIST WATCH
'It made a clear impact just by being different from the five other suits on the podium. It's not a 100pc rule across the firm but more than half my colleagues wear the kilt when they visit clients.'
Following is a list of the 100 best first lines from novels, as decided by the American Book Review, a nonprofit journal published at the Unit for Contemporary Literature at Illinois State University:
1. Call me Ishmael. -- Herman Melville, Moby-Dick (1851)
3. A screaming comes across the sky. — Thomas Pynchon, Gravity's Rainbow (1973)
30. The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel. — William Gibson, Neuromancer (1984)
38. All this happened, more or less. — Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five (1969)
41. The moment one learns English, complications set in. — Felipe Alfau, Chromos (1990)
53. It was a pleasure to burn. — Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451 (1953)
81. Vaughan died yesterday in his last car-crash. — J. G. Ballard, Crash (1973)
92. He was born with a gift of laughter and a sense that the world was mad. — Raphael Sabatini, Scaramouche (1921)
93. Psychics can see the color of time it's blue. — Ronald Sukenick, Blown Away (1986)
100. The cold passed reluctantly from the earth, and the retiring fogs revealed an army stretched out on the hills, resting. — Stephen Crane, The Red Badge of Courage (1895)
The Budweiser Clydesdales are poised to begin their annual football game when they are rudely interrupted by a streaker: a shorn sheep. He waggles his naked sheep butt, gyrating for the crowd. "Didn't need to see that," says a spectator cowboy. This is a warmhearted, adorable spot, which will no doubt appeal most of all to … small children. Isn't there some sort of law against alcohol brands marketing to kids? Didn't Bud already catch some flak for its kid-friendly lizard characters?
[snip]
Gillette introduces its new Fusion razor, with five blades on the front of the cartridge and a sixth, edge-trimming blade on the back. The ad itself is a pretentious mess (helicopters, scientists, tubes of bubbling chemicals). And I'm terrified to find out what the razors cost. No doubt we're approaching $15 a cartridge at this point. Clean-shavenness will soon be an indicator of extreme wealth. What's great, though, is that this ridiculous, two year-old Onion story—"F*ck Everything, We're Doing Five Blades"—has actually come to life.
[snip]
A Budweiser ad shows a little Clydesdale foal, who tries to haul the beer wagon by himself.* The cart is too big for him, until he gets a helping hand from his horse-mom and horse-dad. This was by far the most family-friendly spot of the evening, and it was for beer! Seriously, this is absurd: An underaged being (granted, a horse) wants to be part of the Budweiser world—even though he's way too young. His parents lovingly aid him in realizing that dream. My interpretation: "Parents, go ahead and buy your kids some beer." Maybe I'm too imaginative. (By the way, I notice that Bud didn't air any "Support Our Troops" ads this year, whereas last year this was the theme of Bud's centerpiece spot. What changed? Does Bud not support our troops anymore? Or is troop support less marketable these days?)
Sunday, February 05, 2006
Royal Tenenbaums Watch
5-year old: "So they used to play FOOTBALL but NOW they get to play SUPERBALL!"
3-year old: "Oh!"
Saturday, February 04, 2006
GIANT SHARK WATCH
A visitor from Minnesota had a frightening encounter with a shark on Maui on Wednesday.
The shark encounter happened between the Molokini Crater and Makena off the Maui coast in the morning. Dan Lankheit, 57, was kayaking with a friend when he said a huge shark nudged his kayak and wouldn't stop following him.
Lankheit and his friend, Bob, were kayaking halfway between Molokini Crater and Makena when the shark appeared.
"I felt something and looked down and this shark brushed my kayak," Lankheit said.
Lankheit said he turned around to check on Bob, who was trailing him by about 150 feet.
"I yelled to Bob, 'Great white,'" Lankheit said. "All I saw was the side of it, as he brushed up against me I saw his eye look at me. Then he just disappeared."
Lankheit kept paddling, hoping the 15- to 18-foot shark would tire and stop following him.
"I saw the dorsal fin following me and I thought, 'This is not a good thing,'" Lankheit said.
The shark pursued him for about 15 minutes. That's when a boat full of snorkelers from the Maui Dive Shop approached the kayakers.
"I started waving at 'em, 'Please come here,'" Lankheit said.
"When he waved us over, I could see there was a pretty large animal behind him," said Capt. Rae Eckert Stewart, of Maui Dive Shop. "He was just, you know, swimming along, looking at the kayak."
[Editors note: Kayak AKA Snack]
These Pants Saved My Life
These Pants Saved My Life
IF YOU ARE THE CARHARTT SALES REPRESENTATIVE IN ALASKA, you hear so many stories about how your durable, mud-brown work wear has saved people's flabby backsides from wolf fangs and grizzly-bear bites that, after a while, you stop recalling the individual anecdotes. Except during the annual Carhartt Ball in Talkeetna, a winter festival at which fans gather to celebrate another year of survival on The Last Frontier.
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
GIANT SHARK WATCH: Troy
JACQUES Cousteau's grandson has continued the family's undersea tradition by tracking sharks in a submarine inspired by a Tintin book.
Fabien Cousteau, 38, first saw the cover of Red Rackham's Treasure — showing Tintin in a shark-shaped submarine — when he was seven.
Only now has his dream of emulating the boy reporter come true, thanks to Troy, named after the Trojan horse.
The submarine looks so much like the great white sharks that live off Guadeloupe, part of Baja California, that they have accepted the craft as one of their own, giving him an unmatched opportunity to observe and film their lives.
[snip]
Troy is powered by silent pneumatic power that waves the tail from side to side in the same way as a real shark.
The sharks soon took to Mr Cousteau's submarine.
"They're very smart animals, with the largest brain mass capacity of any shark, and they're normally very elusive," said Mr Cousteau, his American accent tinged with a slight French inflection.
"They're so elusive that we still don't know how long they live, or their sexual habits or the exact details of how they give birth. But they accepted me. And we found out lots of things we didn't know about them before."
The sea is, so to speak, in Mr Cousteau's blood.
[snip]
Mr Cousteau also hopes his shark footage will dispel the evil image of the great white as a bloodthirsty killer.
"Of course I was scared to go up so close to them," Mr Cousteau said.
"What sort of fool goes after sharks in a shark-shaped sub? I don't like pulling on strange dogs' tails, either.
"But my fear was just the same primordial fear we all feel of creatures that are bigger than us in an area we don't belong.
"Fewer than 12 people a year are killed by whites. We shouldn't demonise them so much."
Shark-Shaped Submarine Is Latest Cousteau Star Vehicle